Friday 29 August 2008

Official Police Blotter

Buffalo, New York region:

A female on Main Street believed that her cupcakes had been poisoned because she was fatigued and had a dry mouth.

A one-legged turkey was reportedly in the middle of Willow Ridge Drive. The complainant said the bird was unable to move to the side, but it chased the patrol car that responded.

A person called from Niagara Falls Boulevard to report that a woman was beating on her own car.

Police charged a 21-year-old East Aurora man with leaving the scene of an accident after police received a call of an explosion on Ellicott Road. When they arrived, they found a 20-year-old East Aurora man on the side of the road. He told police he was riding in the back of his friend's pickup truck when he heard something that sounded like an M-80. He said he stood up, lost his balance and fell off the back of the truck.

On Northwood Drive a complaint was made about two males selling magazines. They said they weren't selling anything, just practicing to be attorneys.

A 911 hang-up call was investigated on Bridlewood Drive. A child called because he was hungry. His parents were advised.

A woman called police from a Main Street address because a man was snoring in front of the TV. Reportedly she was intoxicated and was going to wait for police outside. The report didn't indicate the man and woman's relationship to each other.

Police responded to a call on Amberwood Drive in which a woman reported receiving statements for banks she didn't belong to. She was advised it was just junk mail.

Police were called about a highly intoxicated male, who was in town for the Bills game, and was lying in Transit Road. The man called his girlfriend, saying he was in the back of a truck, being driven around by unknown people.

A shopper reported that while she was waiting for the cab driver to load her groceries at a store on Sheridan Drive, two older ladies came by and took half of her things and she didn't discover it until she got home. The call was cancelled when her husband located the groceries.

Police were called to a dispute on Creekside Drive where a 15-year-old girl was out of control. The mother controlled the situation by sitting on the daughter.

A Tonawanda man on a motorcycle struck a parked car. Upon police arrival, the driver was sitting on top of his motorcycle and smelled like alcohol. When asked if he had been drinking, he replied, "Way too much."

A patrol stopped a vehicle believed to have been involved in a larceny on Center Road. The driver had several items for which he had no receipts in his car, including a bag of ham, two cases of Ramen noodles, a package of beef tenderloin and two onions. The suspect also had a marijuana joint in the ash tray of his car.

A woman reportedly left her purse in her unlocked vehicle as she used a restroom in Ellicott Creek Park. After she returned to her vehicle and drove away, she realized her purse was missing. When she returned to the park later that evening she was chased away by skunks.

A woman reportedly parked her vehicle on Hamilton Road overnight and when she returned, it had been covered in marshmallow fluff, bologna and mustard.

On Foxberry Drive a resident complained about a substance, possibly paint, on the complainant's 2006 Cobalt. Police reported it was goose droppings.

A Lexington Green man befriended a woman who called herself "Jasmine" while at a bar on Elmwood Avenue. He brought her home and the two were talking and having beers when she offered to make him a mixed drink. She prepared the drink and then reportedly kept nagging him to "guzzle it down." He finished the drink and passed out within 15 minutes. When he awoke around 10 the next morning, he found the following items missing from his residence: a laptop computer, cell phone, CD player, Coach watch and hooded sweatshirt.

A white male with gray hair filled two plastic bags with various merchandise at Rite-Aid on Seneca Street and fled without paying. The stolen merchandise included skin care products, an electric razor, two at-home cocaine drug tests, two bottles of Advil and 11 packages of razor blades.

Emergency responders were called to Crosspointe Parkway where one person was bleeding from stitches and another passed out from seeing the blood.

from alt.usage.english

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